Lasting the Work Day

   Lucky me, while some are off today and others leaving at noon i'll be stuck begrudgingly at work answering phone call after phone call adnaseum. However, this will not deter me one bit from getting absolutely pumped for my trip to blacksburg. I plan to distribute the following actions into said boring routine:

-- Start the day with a balanced breakfast. For me, fruity pebbles. You may want a baco-egg n' chee but who am I to judge.

-- Change my background every hour on the hour to various players on the team.

-- Refer to my facial hair in the third person. For example, The Stubble will not fax this for you or The Mustache wants more coffee.

-- knock a stack of papers out of someone's hands and run around the office like its a blocked punt.

-- actually punt something

-- Head-butt the mini helmet on my desk. Repeatedly.

-- chug a beer during my lunch hour. A Foster's would just be showing off.

-- end at least 10 phone calls with, "NO TWEEDY, IT'S WHIP!" and slam the phone down.

-- coach speak.

-- Blare Enter Sandman for a few minutes but act totally unaware as to where or how its playing.

-- Blare Enter Sandman on the shitter. 

-- High five anyone wearing maroon or orange. ANYONE. 

-- Hokie Pokie after the 3rd quarter of the day

-- Buy drumstick. Gnaw on it like its a turkey leg.

-- Face-paint

-- Jingle keys in coworker's face

   I could keep going on but i'm sure you have gems off your own. Don't let the man put you down folks because to be the man you gotta beat the man. WOO!